I don't know about you...

...but I speak pretty good English. It is my first language, and was for several years my only language. I would say that I am quite familiar with it.

My knowledge of Russian is, shall we say, less that perfect. (Dr. Friedberg, if you are reading this, you can stop laughing.) Thus, I find myself using a variety of dictionary-like devices, most beloved of which is the indomitable multitran.ru, a fabulous user-edited concoction of dictionary/thesaurus/spellcheck/grammar that is as interactive as all get out.

Usually, it serves me well. Almost always, it has exactly what I need, presented in a way that even my fuzzy little brain can understand.

Sometimes, however, I think that it has been smoking crack.

For instance, to the poor Russian translator seeking the English word for "пиджак", it offers "coat" and "jacket" and "blazer."

Under the 'improper slang' category, however, it also offers "bum-freezer" and "ass-perisher."

Imagine.

When selecting a likely word, myself, I am often haunted by the interesting translations I have seen on the English side. How often have I made the same mistake as the hapless student in Komchatka that believes that 'hoochy' is the proper military term for a house? Or that 'Bossy' is a good term for what we would usually call meat?

Would you, under the same logic, call a piece of dog 'Rex'?

It's a nail-biter, I tell you. All the cross referencing in the world can't save you.

(And yes, I've packed a nice warm ass-perisher already.)